Lifetime Guarantee

Ever have someone tell you that "deserve" something good in your life because you're such a good person? Or maybe you've gone through a tough time and one of your friends tells you, "You're definitely due for some good stuff now."

Did I miss something here? Was there some contract that I didn't get a chance to sign that guarantees us all happy lives and good times? The fact of the matter is that life itself doesn't assure anyone that just because they're "good" or "deserving", they get what they want out of life.

Not everyone gets what they want.

From that point, there are a few different ways to approach the issue. Some would say that our destinies are written already - that some of us are already fated to have crappy lives or awesome ones. Others will say that we make our own fate, constantly pushing that boulder uphill just to let it roll down the other side and push it up again.

Religious folks would say that God (or Buddha or Vishnu or XR-82 or whatever) wants us to be good...but even they can't agree on what role being a "good" person has to do with your life. Some divisions of Christianity believe that you can and should do as many good works as you can with your life; others believe that no matter how many good works you do, it doesn't matter because your faith is what is ultimately important.

So the real question here is: how do you get what you want out of life? Or even more broad - can you get what you want out of life?

I don't pretend to have all of the answers but for all of my pondering about this lately, I've come up with this answer: You can get what you want, but you have to be very clear about what that is first.

A lot of people think they know what would make them happy. They behave like a "good" person in order to achieve that goal. But usually, people don't really know what they should be focusing on. And if you try too hard to make it work, you might end up doing more harm than good. I think, at least in my case, when I find myself wondering if life has it out for me or if my being a "good" person is having any effect, I need to pause for a moment to reevaluate what it is that I want from life. What do I "deserve"?

There is no annoying fabric-thingy sewed on to us like they do on mattresses that confirms that each of us has a right to what we deserve. But if we can figure out what it is that we expect from life, it makes it a bit easier to work for it.